In case you missed it, this past Thursday, Enes Kanter continued the tradition of athletes injuring themselves in stupid and ridiculous ways. During the second quarter of an eventual double digit win, a frustrated Kanter slammed his arm into a bench chair, fracturing it. He’s slated to be sidelined the next 6-8 weeks, but one man’s misfortune is another’s crappy blog post, so let’s take a look:

Now let’s take the opportunity to look back at some of the other crazy, self-inflicted injuries athletes have given themselves in recent years.

Kendrys Morales:

What’s worse than breaking a bone in a game your team goes on to win by double figures? Winning the game and tearing your ACL on a conservative celebration. For a player thats never played for the Mets, this is a pretty Mets-like stroke of bad luck. Morales recently won a World Series with the Royals, but this will unfortunately be the moment he’s remembered for.

Amar’e Stoudemire:

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Playoff appearances have been few and far between for the Knickerbockers, it figures that their 2012 appearance resulted in one of the most embarrassing moments in team history. After falling behind 2-0 in their first round series to the Miami Heat, STAT took out his frustrations on an innocent fire extinguisher case, and lost. What made this even worse was that the Knicks were never going to beat the LeBron James led Heat. What makes this EVEN MORE WORSE is that Stoudemire spent the offseason growing out some ridiculous cornrows and was never the same player.

Jason Pierre-Paul:

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As I looked for photos to attach to this entry, I found myself too disgusted to post a photo of JPP’s unclubbed hand, you’re welcome. Since becoming a walking Fireworks Safety PSA, Pierre-Paul has returned to football without losing much on-field effectiveness. Overall, I’d call this the most devastating hand injury since George Costanza’s hand-modeling career was tragically cut short by a clothes iron.

Owen Schmitt:

While many of you may be scratching your heads at who Schmitt even is, the video on this one is too good not to share. Schmitt’s career only lasted a few years, but he may have given himself a career’s worth of head injuries on a single pre-game hype binge. Here’s hoping he didn’t and that he’s able to collect some residuals every time a major network shows this.

Honorable Mentions (no good video/pictures available) :

Duaner Sanchez: Mets fans, to this day, will blame Sanchez for costing their team a World Series win in 2006 (when they’re done blaming Aaron Heilman, and David Wright). Less than 48 hours before the trading deadline Sanchez decided to go for some late night chow on a Miami road trip. What was a quest for fourth meal resulted in a season-ending shoulder injury when his cab got into an accident. It’s never been confirmed, but it’s suspected that the Mets were close to a deal for Astros’ ace Roy Oswalt before having to scramble and replace Sanchez.

Jerry Blevins: This one isn’t as crazy as the others, but its recency brought it to mind. After a Dee Gordon comebacker fractured Blevins’ forearm, he suffered the same injury while slipping on a street curb. The injury reoccurred just a few weeks before the left-hander was scheduled to return. Like Sanchez, Mets fans wonder if the dominant bullpen arm could’ve changed the outcome of 2015’s World Series. At least the next time a Met reliever suffers a freak injury, we’ll know they’ll be making a deep playoff run that year.

Joba Chamberlain: To finish the hat trick of relievers, we have Joba Chamberlain suffering an “open dislocation” of his ankle. Gruesome and life-threatening, yes, but the fact that it happened on a trampoline makes it fine to joke about,  probably. Previously, Chamberlain had already earned the label of “top prospect bust” and was in the process of recovering from Tommy John surgery, so this added injury to insult…and injury. You may be wondering why I haven’t made a single weight joke. Low. Hanging. Fruit. (which Joba already ate).

Geno Smith: Attention Daily Dart Readers and Contributors: PAY YOUR BOOKIE. With the Jets starting QB job all but locked up, Smith had his jaw broken on the wrong end of a IK Enemkpali right hook. Enemkpali claimed that Smith owed him money for plane tickets, Smith claimed ignorance. But in my expert opinion, it sounds like Geno put a few hundred bucks on WVU to appear in the Final Four and ‘forgot’ about it. Same ol’ Jets.

 

-Kap